Nollywood actor, Ernest Asuzu, and his wife, Jennifer, speak about their seven-year-old marriage
How and when did you meet your wife?
Ernest: I met my wife in Calabar some years ago, when I went to shoot a video. As soon as we met, I told her she would be my wife. I requested for her telephone number and afterwards, we spoke on the phone. Thereafter, we began to meet on a timely basis before we began to date and later got married.
What was her response when you told her she would be your wife?
Ernest: She only laughed, which was expected of her as a woman. However, she was not difficult to relate with.
What was your reaction when he said he would marry you?
Jennifer: I just laughed it off. It was absurd meeting someone for the first time and telling her she would be your wife. Nevertheless, we started communicating and seeing each other regularly.
What was the attraction?
Jennifer: What really got me attracted to him was that I found him to be a God-fearing individual. He always talked about God and that prompted me to know more about him. He turned out to be a nice person. He was different from what people were used to seeing in movies.
How long did you date for before you got married?
Ernest: We dated for a long time, but we got married in 2009. I proposed to her around that period and we got married
Did her parents object to the relationship based on the bad boy roles you played in movies?
Ernest: Her mum passed away before we met, so I met with only her father. He welcomed me nicely and I told him I came to marry his daughter. He saw me as a nice person and after we discussed, he asked me to bring my family to meet with theirs.
What were some of initial challenges you faced when you got married to each other?
Jennifer: The main challenge I had was that he was not always available. He was always travelling around for his job and shooting videos, but I held on to God. We also spoke all the time and that kept me going.
How would you describe the bond that exists between the two of you?
Jennifer: We met and fell in love naturally like any man and woman would.
Is your marriage perfect?
Jennifer: A marriage can never be perfect; it is only God that can make it work. We also disagree and argue like every other couple. At the end of the day, we learn from our mistakes and move on. This helps us to reach an agreement.
What kind of man is your husband?
Jennifer: He plays the role of a father, husband and brother. One amazing thing about him is that he has the heart of a child; he does not have a heart of stone. He might seem tough when he talks, but he is not really that way.
What are some of the things you do to get each other angry?
Ernest: She has some principles that I find rather uncomfortable and they do not go down well with me. However, we always try to find a balance and make everything work.
Jennifer: He likes to throw things in various random directions in his room. He likes a lot of clothes, shoes and caps which he never places in their correct positions. He only returns them to their rightful positions after we might have argued about it. Disturbing him whenever he is listening to music can also lead to arguments. Aside from these, he is a nice person.
How do you make up when you have misunderstandings?
Jennifer: Discussing issues helps us to settle our differences. One thing about marriage is that when you involve a third party to settle your issues, they would destroy your marriage. All you have to do is understand each other, your likes, dislikes and try to balance it. That keeps our marriage going.
How were you able to build a successful marriage?
Ernest: I am a prayerful person. Whenever I encounter any issues, I pray to God and ask for solutions. When He gives me solutions, I apply them to my marriage and that works for me.
For some time now, you have not been acting. Is your wife responsible for this?
Ernest: It was because I had challenges with my legs. I needed to recover fully before venturing into acting again. I am a vibrant person who likes to run around and remain very active. I need to be able to do that fully again. I will return to Nollywood when I recover completely, but right now, I am married to my faith.
What advice do you have for intending couples?
Jennifer: They should be prayerful and ensure that they are getting married to the right person else they will have problems in their marriage. They should make God the head of the family and understand each other. They should know their likes, dislikes, be able to share their views and fears with their partner. These things make a marriage healthy.
What advice do you have for celebrities who are also married?
Ernest: They should lean on God first and always do the right things. Also, they should make out time to know their spouses.
Do you both disagree over money?
Jennifer: Money comes and goes. If you enjoy it while you have it, then you both have to adjust and endure when you do not have it. Personally, I do not think it should be a problem in any marriage.
Does your husband help out with chores at home?
Jennifer: He is not the kind of man that wants to do domestic chores. He assists sometimes but not all the time.
How do you spend time as a couple?
Jennifer: We watch music while sipping a glass of wine. But because of his health, we have not really visited a nightclub. We want him to heal completely. We also discuss the Bible and talk about God.
What was the nature of his sickness?
Jennifer: He had a partial stroke, but he is getting better. In fact, his recovery is amazing and we want him to recuperate completely before he can commence any strenuous activity. We are acting according to the advice from the doctors.
Did you feel like leaving him when he was sick?
Jennifer: No, I never felt that way. I knew he would get better and I trusted God too. He is my husband so I could not have left him.
What do you think of the negative stories that were written about him?
Jennifer: It is really painful yet surprising. This was someone that was always beside me, so I wonder why it was reported that he died. What they could have done was to find out if any of the stories were true before they were published. How many people will I explain to that there is no iota of truth in the stories? I feel bad when they write all those things that seek to tarnish my husband’s good image.
What pet names do you call each other?
Jennifer: He calls me Wifey and I call him El Cream. El Cream means El-Shaddai Christ Rules Everything Around Me. – Punch.
