For actress cum filmmaker, Salma Aminu, there is no reason for paternity test as long as there is trust among couples.
In this chat, the Kogi State-born thespian, who is married to fellow actor, Vincent Opurum, recounts her COVID-19 nightmare and plans for 2021.
Excerpts:
How would you describe the year of the pandemic and how did it affect your plans?
Thank God 2020 is gone and I pray what happened last year never repeats itself ever again. The pandemic year has been the worst year of my life, and I believe most people will say so as well. It was a year that everyone needed help but had no one to turn to. I had stayed away for too long and needed to get back on my feet. I had concluded plans with investors on a huge project to be executed in four countries, and then the pandemic happened with the lockdown and all. Consequently, my investors had to save their money against rainy days and the unforeseen since no one knows what more the pandemic may have in store for us. Now I am back to sourcing for investors for that particular project, so yes, the pandemic dealt with me thoroughly.
What are your plans for the year 2021?
2020 has taught me to leave everything in God’s hands. Look at my plans for 2020 and what happened eventually. I have decided to let God do the planning, as he deems fit.
You have been under the radar for almost two years. What is happening?
I’ve been mostly in Lokoja pursuing something that will be revealed pretty soon. I have not been totally under the radar because I have been doing one or two things behind the scenes, though I miss having to be in a total different character, playing different roles and taking direction from the director.
What was it like growing up in a polygamous home?
I was mostly with my mum, so we didn’t really have issues with the rest of the family. Though, I’ll say there’s nothing as good as growing up with both parents under the same roof.
How have you been coping with motherhood?
It’s not easy being a mother because you no longer have the luxury of planning your activities yourself; the baby plans for you. Whatever you’re doing has to be in favour of your baby. I’ve learnt that time is essential. As a mother, there’s no need to procrastinate because you might not have the time you need when you think you have it. Your time is no longer yours. They say get married and have kids, what they never told you is how exactly the journey is going to be. I have been coping just fine without house helps. It has just been my mum trying to help out whichever way she can. Yes, I have my down times but I come out just fine. God has been faithful to me and my mum has been a huge support, I must say.
What does your son mean to you?
My son is my world. He is the sole reason for my hustle. I will destroy anyone and anything that will trouble my son. My major fear is leaving him with people and being unsure of what will happen to him. He is the sole reason I have been slow with work, and that is because I haven’t got a trusted person to stay with him. He is an awesome child and I love him dearly.
As a married woman, do men still chase you?
Of course, my husband should be worried if men no longer admire me. Men admiring me means my husband has got a total package, which others want but can’t have.
When they chase you, how do you handle them?
No, I don’t ward them off; I simply put it into a joke, because without them my work is nothing.
How would you describe marriage?
I don’t want to talk too much about it but it’s been awesome!
There is a raging controversy over paternity test at the moment. Would you encourage couples to do paternity tests for their children?
It is a two-way thing. Is there a reason to doubt? Has the lady or wife broken the trust in the relationship before? If the answers to these questions are positive then I would encourage them to do so. But in a situation where both parties haven’t given any sign to cause distrust, then I don’t see a reason for a paternity test. A relationship can only survive where there is trust. If there is no trust, why remain in a relationship to the extent of subjecting your wife to a paternity test?
What would be your reaction if your hubby suddenly says he wants paternity test?
Really? My husband? I will go for a paternity test and then give him the result along with divorce papers. For my husband to ask for a paternity test shows he has lost all trust in me, and I am sure I haven’t given him any reason whatsoever to distrust me. The relationship broke when he asked for a paternity test; I will only make it formal.
What is your advice for young girls who believe sleeping around is the quickest way to success?
By sleeping around, you are loosing more than you are gaining. Even if they don’t show it to your face, you can never be taken seriously not to talk of putting your health at risk. There is nothing like working and making your own money. It might be slow but trust me you will gain respect. And no matter how long it takes, you will get to your goal if you work hard and smart. Men respect ladies they can have intelligent and productive conversations with, not the ones easy to bed. One thing every lady should know is that you are responsible for every choice you make in life. At the end of the day, you’ve got no one to blame but you.
How did you receive news of Chico Ejiro’s passing?
It hurts badly. My greatest pain and regret is that I never worked with him, and that is a dream shattered for me. I have always respected him and will continue to respect him even in death. He is irreplaceable. Nollywood has lost a legend and a gem. – The Sun.
